I usually ride on multi lane main roads,some cycle paths if roads are busy but as a shift worker I ride in at night as well as daytime. Often go a longer way in or out to log up a few extra kms.I have a locker at work and only carry the clothes and food I need for each shift, and shower when I arrive at work.I have LED flashing lights, white front red rear. I use a pannier on MTB and rucksack on my road bike. Usually only use MTB at night or in wet weather as I have fenders fitted to it and more durable tyres.
I'm married with three children. We do own a car but my wife usually has it.I like to ride with my children,and have done some very limited touring. My nine year old seems to be the only one at my house who wants to ride with me now as her older sisters now have always got "more important" things to do.
A few near misses on busy roads, but they are probably almost the same as yours.